As most of you know Kaycee Brooks is 18 months old (corrected age 14 months, meaning if she was born on her due date this would be her age now) She is a surviving twin and was born at 25 weeks and 2 days. Her sister, Corrie (said like the boy’s name Corey, not after my favourite soap … ha) sadly passed away in the womb at 25 weeks.



Kaycee has spent most of her life in hospital. In total she has spent a mere 9 weeks at home on and off, the longest stretch being 10 days without a Hospital admission. She has given the hardest strongest fight of survival and still to this day (01.03.2012) Kaycee is still fighting and literally living life on the edge.



I thought it would be nice to let people know her full background and share her life experience properly, just for future reference for Kaycee to read back on when she’s a big girl and also to help or guide, anyone who will either experience any part of this situation.



The reason for me publishing a blog, with a donation button on is not out of pure cheek, not us being a charity case but simply to raise a bit of money for Kaycee, her future, her care (if we need to seek quicker care privately) travelling and living expenses whilst we hold vigil besides Kaycee. I do not want anyone to think we are begging, I just feel with all the support we have people will understand, and not take pity but want to support us. We are hospitalised and we aren’t living in “real life” and people are always always asking what can we do to help. So I spoke to a support worker and she suggested this and to be honest it has took me a good number of months to actually do this, to sit down and re-live Kaycee’s life and to relive my experience with my other daughter Corrie.



It does bring back a lot of painful but happy memories but also angers me at the same time because I do see it from other peoples points of view, when I sit down and think of our situation and see that we have and are in such a bad position in life. But we have been dealt with these cards in life and we have to deal with that.



I am only as strong as I am because I have the most amazing daughter anyone could ever dream of having and I think this applies to most premmie parents or long term sick children. You truly are blessed to have a special child. I totally believe that we are blessed and I do not wish to change anything in my life. I just wish better health for Kaycee and may be one day be that in 1 month’s time or 10 years we will live a normal happy life as a family at home. But in the meantime I will make sure every 24 hours of my daughter’s life has a special memory. Not only does she inspire her army of fans but she is a true inspiration to us as parents. And the most warmest thought is I have two of these girls, and although Corrie isn’t here, I know she is exactly the same as Kaycee and wherever she is she is being a cheeky girl and making everyone love her just as much as Kaycee is doing down here with us.



I am truly truly blessed to be her mummy.



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There are no classes in life for beginners: right away you are always asked to deal with what is most difficult.

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After packing our accommodation up, we set off after the ambulance had gone so that we could give time for Kaycee to settle into her new surroundings etc.   

We arrived about an hour after Kaycee.   Everything was so different.  Whereas at Wythenshawe someone was also by Kaycee’s bed.  At Oldham they all sat at a nursing station watching monitors.   I didn’t like the set up but we got told different places have different policies and really Kaycee was well enough not to need 1 to 1 nursing.  It didn’t feel welcoming at all.  The nurses were nice but we never really spoke to any of them until the evening.    The most distressing part was because I knew that I would have to leave her alone in this place at night.   We didn’t leave until late that evening.     The next week day we got told that we had to buy Kaycee’s nappys.   I know this sounds silly but I burst into tears.   Kaycee didn’t fit in newborn sizes or anything and I just felt silly asking where we buy them from.   I was so upset that they couldn’t supply these.   We went Boots and a lovely lady helped up buy Micro Nappys.   They were so expensive for a pack of 20.  By now I didn’t have a good vibe about Oldham.   I couldn’t and didn’t feel at ease.  I felt at this stage Kaycee was too complex for them.    But I just thought it was me being her mummy and being very overprotective. 

As the weeks went by we got to know a few nurses, told them what had happened so far with our lifes and we established a good friendship with them.   I started coming round to the idea and realised that this was the next stage in Kaycee’s life and it meant we were closer to getting her home.   So I started to , relax and “enjoy” the experience, of doing all Kaycee’s cares, feeds and getting to know my daughter.   The hurtful thing at the time was, that I still couldn’t let go of Corrie.  I still cried every night once leaving Kaycee and still didn’t feel close to Kaycee like I was with Corrie.  

Novemeber came and Kaycee started to get poorly.   Obviously due to use being so naïve we got fobbed off saying its what “all” premature babies do, so you accept it and move on.  We thought going back on cpap / bipap was normal to give her a “rest”.   Not the fact that my daughter was very poorly and couldn’t breathe by herself like we know now.   I remember walking in in the morning, and finding my daughter on these machines.   No one had rung us in the night to tell us she had gotten so unwell.   I only realise this now because any slight change the phone rings and your informed.  This angers me so much now, communication is the key especially when that baby is yours who they are treating.     

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