Over the course of the 8 weeks we
spent at Wythenshawe SCBU. We didn’t
know much of the medical side that was happening. We just came and seen Kaycee helped with her
cares and just listened to the doctors.
Not that we understood anything they told us even in the simplest of
terms they could possibly tell us in. I
just didn’t get any of it. I remember
them once taking us to a side room and telling us that due to the lack of blood
going to her toes she might lose one or maybe more. I remember feeling heartbroken and thinking I
don’t want my daughter to have funny feet.
Gosh if only that was her only problem now, I wouldn’t be bothered.
Its scary how naïve you actually are
to it all, every parent we spoke to we all were like, yes that’s what they are
doing to my baby. We all thought it was
normal to be like this, and for our babies to be like this. When in fact looking back, our babies were
fighting for survival and trying to fight through SCBU. Which I now know was the most important part
of Kaycee’s life. Better treatment in
the early years helped them so much in later life and to this day I stick by
this. Wythenshawe was a very small but
fantastic unit, everyone nurse was brilliant and answered any questions you
wanted to ask, even if it was the most silliest question in the world they
would answer it.
Kaycee was doing fantastic, only
spent 32 days on the vent, but because she was a micro prem and under 1kg, she
had been on the vent for over 28 days she developed Chronic Lung Disease. At this stage of our life’s we didn’t think
too much into that because we got told they grow out of it and live a normal
life. Naivety is an amazing thing.
Then on 23rd October I
went upstairs and got told Kaycee was going Oldham. I remember running back to Michael and
telling him in floods of tears. Michael
re-assured me and we went back up to see Kaycee and to speak to the
nurses. They reassured us and told us
because she has been doing fantastic and been on Cpap and having time off in
oxygen she was stable enough to be transported back to Oldham for care on a
lower level. Normally a neonate has to
reach 1kg to be classed as high dependency, but being the little monkey that
Kaycee was instead of putting that extra 20grams on she lost it. So she was 960grams in weight but classed as
high dependency due to the level of breathing support she needed. Looking back she did do pretty amazing at
Wythenshawe and I do believe that if she would have stayed there we quite
possibly wouldn’t be in this situation now. Don’t get me wrong she would still
have her problems but I think Kaycee was never suitable to be moved from such a specialist unit to Oldham
where they had never seen a baby like Kaycee with many complications that she
brought with her.
The transport team arrived and I
burst into tears seeing her in her portable incubator, I was heartbroken and
scared. I was leaving a hospital where
I had my girls, said goodbye to one of my girls and experienced the hardest
days off my life there. I couldn’t
believe that I had to leave after what felt like a lifetime of being
there. I don’t like goodbyes. I was upset to leave the nurses too as they
had been my support at the times that I was struggling, but more than anything
I had made friends with other premmie mums.
Friendships that no other friendship could compete with because they too
had a special baby, and they understood how you feel and what it was like to
feel robbed of your pregnancy. I again I
felt isolated.
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